Why do some people stop talking to girls without even talking to them for a few words, while others chat with girls for a long time without making any progress.
In addition to poor chatting skills and boring conversation, another major reason is: not clear positioning of one's own role.
Only when you know clearly what role you want to play in chatting with her will you know what you should say to her. Otherwise, when the relationship is very shallow, if you say some explicit words to a girl when you get angry, then the girl will be scared away. When the relationship is very deep, if you are still polite to her and reject her, wouldn't the girl feel very uncomfortable? Disappointed?
To be honest, quite a few brothers have fallen into this. Many people think that if they plan to date a girl, they should be more intimate, otherwise the girl will not know that they are chasing her, and then they will do something that scares the girl.
For example, not long after you have just met a girl, she treats you as a friend and tells you something unhappy, and then you say "hug" to her. The girl will be very surprised: I'm not that familiar with him, right? What does he want to do with me? I didn't expect this man to be so impatient!
When the girl thinks like this, then She will definitely be afraid. If you say anything to please her in the future, it will be regarded as seeking the benefit of your lower body, and then you will no longer be able to attract her.
To be honest, almost all girls want to touch or say something very ambiguous to a man as soon as they get along with him. The behavior is disgusting from the bottom of her heart, even if it is YP, she still wants to see what is worthy of her in you.
Therefore, when you first meet a girl, position yourself as a "friend".
Get along as friends, do what friends should do, don’t say overly intimate words, don’t go beyond the rules between men and women, and let the girl interact with you with peace of mind. Only then can you release her correctly. attraction.
It’s better to leave words like “hug” until the relationship with the girl is deeper! For example... after you are attracted to her.
Why does one person attract another person? Because he or she shows value to the other person or just touches the other person's interest. The so-called love at first sight is basically a myth.
For example, why do you like this girl? It may be that chatting with her is pleasant, it may be that she is lively and outgoing, it may be that she is gentle and considerate, it may be that she is well-behaved, sensible, considerate, etc. These can make you Which of the reasons why you like her doesn't take a while to figure out?
Of course, for a large number of male compatriots, they like this girl simply because she is beautiful and has a good figure. But it’s best not to give this reason.Come on, because the content is too real, it can easily cause discomfort to the other party.
Therefore, it takes a process to transform yourself into an "attracted" character. If you are attracted to girls as soon as you start, To say I like you so much is absolutely to the point of death.
If you just say to a girl, "I like you," when you have just met her and you barely know her at all, it is quite unreasonable and the girl will not believe it from the bottom of her heart. , I think you said this because you definitely want to flirt with her, and then just avoid her for fun.
Therefore, some brothers confess their love to girls as soon as they get started. This is quite scary for girls. It is not strange at all if they reject you without hesitation.
Only after a period of contact, you have enough knowledge of her, or she shows you her attraction and shows attraction to her on the premise of "reasonable and well-founded", can a girl You will feel that this is a matter of course and that you really mean it.
How long does this process take?
In fact, it does not depend on how long you have known each other, but on the amount of information you exchange.
So if you chat with a girl every day and don’t talk about any valuable topics, and the girl doesn’t show you any of her characteristics, then this process will take a long time.
If on the first day you met, you felt like you were late and had endless topics to talk about, but you exchanged enough information with each other and showed enough value in just one day, then in those three days It's not surprising to pick up girls.
Having said so much, everyone should also understand what the next step is: to have enough understanding of the girl, and After showing each other's value, you must promptly position your role as a pursuer.
If your relationship with a girl develops to a deep enough level but you still keep your role as a friend, you are in danger of falling into the friendship zone, and then you can really only be a friend in the future.
This principle is also very simple.
When your relationship with a girl can be described by the word "very good" (the so-called "very good" means that the girl is interested in you), the girl's emotional status towards you There are two types: one is that although she is interested in you, she doesn't think much about it and feels that she and you are just friends; the other is that she is already interested in you, but she will not take the initiative to express it.
Needless to say, everyone should understand the first type. When she treats you as a friend, and you get along with her as a friend, your relationship will definitely develop as a friend. forward.
Only by positioning yourself in the role of pursuer and letting her feel your special feelings for her can a girl adjust her role in time and develop the direction of love in the past.way to get along with you, otherwise she will always only treat you as a friend.
As for the second type of girls, brothers, what is the difference between friends and lovers?
Everyone must know that the relationship between friends is a gentleman's relationship, which is based on love and politeness. There is no emotional or physical needs for each other, so they have always been well-behaved in the way they get along. Lovers are emotionally dependent on each other and have the physiological need to reproduce. Naturally, the way the two get along is very different.
You have always positioned yourself as a friend, and you have always behaved yourself when getting along with girls. As time goes by, the girl feels that you really only treat her as a friend, then she will also adjust her role positioning, just It's just to adjust yourself from the role of a secret admirer to the role of a gentleman.
