When many boys are chasing girls, they like to show their goodwill by replying to each other's messages instantly. However, in fact, replying to messages instantly does not mean that you love her in the eyes of girls, especially in the early stages of dating. Those boys who reply to messages immediately will not be able to catch up with the girl they love.

This principle is just like when you are pursuing a girl, you have a rough budget in mind, but unknowingly you find that "the more you spend, the more gifts you buy The more expensive it is,” it’s like a snowball.

Why is this happening?

From a psychological point of view, we have fallen into the "slippery slope fallacy" ".

In short, from a girl’s perspective, if you are “nice” to her, you must be “nicer” to her. If one day you are not so "nice" to her and suddenly stop replying to messages, she will feel that you have changed your feelings towards her.

You may also say that you will be good to her all your life, but that is unrealistic. Now you can be endlessly nice to her, but sooner or later there will come a day when you can't hold it any longer.

So, in order to avoid that day coming, we try not to develop the habit of replying to her messages instantly from the beginning. You should know that in addition to being detrimental to long-term relationships, there are three disadvantages to replying messages instantly:

First, replying messages instantly can easily give girls a sense of, "You are waiting to chat with her 24 hours a day." "Feeling.

Some friends may think, isn’t this bad?

Of course this is not good. In the eyes of girls, unless your hard value is extremely high and your family's gold and silver can't be used up in a lifetime, generally speaking, "doing something" is of much higher value than "being idle".

Some friends may say that this is a sign that I am willing to "spend time with her". Why is the other party unwilling to acknowledge my affection?

Let's put it this way, middle-aged. Between husband and wife, the wife may complain that her husband spends too little time with the family, but when young people fall in love, the most important thing they lack is time.

A girl has a circle of friends, and the opposite sex who spends time with her has to line up. No one can chase a girl just by saying "I have time".

Second, replying to the message instantly reveals your needs and the fact that "you like her".

Admittedly, replying to her immediately is not a sign that you love her, but we are not children anymore. If you do this every day, girls will more or less understand what you mean.

You may feel that this is just what you want, and you should let her know if you like her.

But once the other party sees through your mind, all your contacts with her will be purposeful in her view, and she will start to be wary of you.

At this time you will become very passive, becauseShe feels that she is "fixed" on you and wants you to reply to her messages 24 hours a day. To her, you are so humble and dispensable.

Third, replying to the message instantly will make you no longer mysterious at all. She has no intention of chatting with you. power.

Curiosity is human nature, and independence and mystery are more attractive. Whether you and the girl you like just met or you are friends in the same circle, you have to leave a sense of mystery to her.

It can be that you are busy with other things, or even give her the illusion that you are chatting with other girls. In short, you should make her feel that she does not know you well enough. There is motivation to continue to get to know you.

To be honest, if she sends you a sentence every day and has short conversations with parents, and she even knows what brand of toothpaste you use, I don’t think she has any intention of being with you.

Friends, you can imagine: a boy whose whereabouts are erratic on WeChat and full of mystery is compared with another boy who is always in front of the screen and is always available. If you are a girl, What would you choose?

Therefore, we should try not to develop the habit of replying to her messages immediately from the beginning, and learn to control our emotions.