Arguing is an inevitable problem that couples will encounter, and a girlfriend's childish quarrel thinking is even more troublesome. How to deal with your girlfriend’s childish quarrelsome thinking? Suggestions will be given below from several aspects.
1. Stay calm
When your girlfriend falls into childish quarrels, the first thing to do is to stay calm. Don't be swayed by her emotions, and don't lose your temper easily. Because once you are also in an emotional state, the arguments will only become more intense and the possibility of solving the problem will be greatly reduced.
While staying calm, you can try to guide her out of the quarrel. You can de-escalate the situation by speaking calmly and analyzing the problem rationally. Tell her that you understand how she feels, but you also want her to calm down and work together to find a solution to the problem.
2. Listen and express understanding
A girlfriend’s childish quarrelsome thinking often stems from her strong identification with and expression of her own feelings. During an argument, try to listen to her and express your understanding of her feelings.
When she complains or accuses, instead of immediately retorting or defending, listen and acknowledge her feelings first. You can express understanding by saying things like, "I understand why you are so angry," or "I understand that you would like more attention and understanding." Doing this will make her feel cared for and respected by you, thereby reducing the likelihood of an argument.
3. Find common solutions
In the naive quarrel thinking of girlfriends, it is easy to have black and white, either/or concepts. To avoid getting stuck in endless arguments, try to find common solutions.
First, identify the problem and find a solution acceptable to both parties. Consensus can be reached through communication, compromise and concessions. At the same time, we should also pay attention to avoid being self-centered and consider the needs and interests of the other party.
If you find that you cannot reach a consensus during the dispute, you can temporarily stop and think calmly, or seek help and opinions from a third party. It's important not to let arguments become the trigger for hurt feelings.
4. Develop communication skills
Girlfriends’ childish quarrelsome thinking is often related to poor communication. Therefore, developing good communication skills is very important to deal with such problems.
First, learn to listen. Not only listen to what she says, but also understand what she means and how she feels. At the same time, you must also learn to express your opinions and needs, but you must pay attention to your tone and method to avoid being too intense or aggressive.
Secondly, we must be good at using "I" to express our opinions and feelings instead of blaming the other party. For example, "I think we could try...", "I hope we can communicate better..." etc. Doing so will reduce the likelihood of arguments andIncrease problem-solving effectiveness.
5. Maintain personal boundaries
When dealing with your girlfriend’s childish quarrelsome thinking, you should also pay attention to maintaining your own personal boundaries. If her behavior has seriously affected your mood and life, you can express your dissatisfaction and needs appropriately.
You can tell her that you want to stay calm and rational during the argument and find a better solution. At the same time, you should also clearly tell her your bottom line and principles, as well as your tolerance for quarrels.
If she still cannot change her childish quarrelsome thinking, she may need to consider whether it is suitable for her to continue the relationship. After all, a mature, healthy relationship should be based on mutual respect and equal communication.
When dealing with your girlfriend's childish argumentative thinking, it's important to stay calm, listen and express understanding, find mutual solutions, develop communication skills, and maintain personal boundaries. Only through the efforts and understanding of both parties can a healthy and mature love relationship be established.
